Joachim Breitner

Girl, you will have tenure soon.

sung to the tune of “Girl, you’ll be a woman son”, with apologies to Neil Diamond

A recording on Youtube

Girl, you will have tenure soon
You published so much, can’t count all the talks
You’ve jumped all the hoops and all of the rocks
So much to find
You never got tired of writing stuff down
What we’d never known until you came around
And also so kind
Now you’ll have to make up your mind

Don’t you know, girl, you will have tenure soon
Please, come take this job
Girl, you will have tenure soon
Soon, you’ll need admins


You’ve sent applications describing your life
and what they’re saying your CV is rife
“That girl’s so good“
Well, now finally ask what you’re wishing for
and if they have their chance, they’ll give it for sure
We here would
Oh Prof, we would if we could

Now it’s up to you girl, you will have tenure soon
Please, come take this job
Girl, you will have tenure soon
Soon, you’ll need admins
Girl, you will have tenure soon
Please, come take this job
Girl, you will have tenure soon
Soon but soon, you will need admins

Girl, you will have tenure soon
Please, come take this job